So, lately I've been having little signs of an identity crisis. I don't know if it's cuz I'm so far from my close friends and family or because I'm finally working a permanent job and supporting myself on my own or because I belong to a whole new state now. Maybe it's all of the above.
It started a few weeks ago when I received my California drivers license in the mail. I was really excited at first because I had been waiting for it to arrive since I went to the DMV and passed the test. I took it out of the envelope and was excited to see my new picture. I no longer had my dorky 16-year-old picture to look at. But as I looked at it some more, I noticed how different things seemed. The license was lighter and more flexible than my Oregon license. It has a yellow tint to it. Then I noticed the number. I've gotten so used to my Oregon drivers license number, it's engrained in my head. Now I am E322*&^%$& something something... how am I supposed to remember that? It made me feel like I'm a whole different person, like I'm leaving behind the person I know myself to be. I know it's really not that big a deal, but at the time it got me really sad.
Then this morning I was lounging in my apartment watching TV, the same TV I used to watch at my parents house just a few months ago. (My parents were nice enough to give me this TV and entertainment center). But it reminded me of being back home, in the comfortable and safe environment of my parents' house. Sometimes I wish I could just stay young forever and keep living at home. It's nice to know that someone is taking care of me.
But I know I can't do that. It's time for me to grow up and live a life of my own. But it's hard to do alone. Good thing I have Marley. ;) I kid, but actually my kitty is my companion at home and she does make me feel a little less lonely.
Anyway, things actually are going pretty good down here. I feel I've made a couple close friends and I like the people I work with. They're a fun group. Also, the weather has been nice. It's been a little colder. But when i say cold, I mean like 60's, not 40's like Klamath Falls. However, I'm not very impressed by the colors of fall down here.
Here is a view at my apartment complex. This was one of the few days it's actually rained since I moved here. There's a little bit of fall color, but I remember the falls in Oregon being much more vibrant. Oh well, atleast it's not freezing cold.
2 comments:
Oh Becky, you sound lonely! :( Just a few more weeks and we get to see you.. I can't wait. Growing up does suck sometimes. When you are feeling homesick and like you want someone to take care of you remember to lean into the arms of the Lord. He will give you the comfort that you need. :) I have to remind myself of that sometimes too. Anyway, I love you sooo much.
Love, Julia
Oh, Becky. I'm so proud of you, though. You are doing so good. I can't believe how you've reached out & made friends & joined running & volleyball groups. That's so awesome! This is just a season. You may not always live far away from family. Use your extra time to soak yourself in the Word & learn about your Savior. We love you & miss you. We're looking forward to having you here for Thanksgiving!
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